I forgot how to cry as a man. HRT gave me a range of emotions I never thought possible | Cadance Bell
While many focus on the physical aspects of gender transition, for Cadance Bell, the greatest benefit was existential, like putting the right fuel into an engine for the first time
I forgot how to cry as a man. Laying in an economy box at the end of the funeral home was my departed grandmother. Flowers my mum had chosen hung from a borrowed vase. I sat with my family, numb. I knew I should feel something about her death, but I was empty.
A celebrant was riffing from a lectern. “Sharon, I hear, was a lovely woman,” she said. “It’s Shirl,” came a hesitant voice from the audience. I cringed. “Sorry, Shirl. And now, she’s up there in the Lord’s kingdom in a great big room, with all of the friends who got there before her, and they’re so happy. They’re laughing with Sharon and they’re smiling, and they’re all eating her favourite cake!”